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313+ Best Love Jokes: Adding Humor to Romance

Love is an emotion that can take you on a roller coaster ride of emotions. It can make you feel elated, content, and fulfilled, but it can also bring tears, confusion, and frustration. Sometimes, all you need is a good laugh to lighten the mood and take your mind off things. That's where love jokes come in.

The Importance of Humor in Love

Before we dive into the jokes, let's take a moment to appreciate the importance of humor in a relationship. Humor has been shown to strengthen bonds and create a positive atmosphere in a relationship. Laughing together can help you build intimacy, trust, and open communication.

Knock Knock Jokes

  1. Knock, knock! Who's there? Adore. Adore who? Adore you, who else?
  2. Knock, knock. Who's there? Aherd. Aherd who? Aherd you like guys who tell knock-knock jokes.
  3. Knock, knock. Who's there? Aldo. Aldo who? Aldo anything for you!
  4. Knock, knock. Who's there? Baby Yoda. Baby Yoda who? Baby, Yoda one for me!
  5. Knock, knock. Who's there? Ben. Ben who? Ben thinking about you all day!
  6. Knock, knock. Who's there? Candice. Candice who? Candice be love I'm feeling right now?
  7. Knock, knock. Who's there? Cheese. Cheese who? Cheese awful cute, ain't she?
  8. Knock, knock. Who's there? Cynthia. Cynthia who? Cynthia been away, I've missed you.
  9. Knock, knock. Who's there? Disguise! Disguise who? (Point thumbs at your chest) Disguise your boyfriend!
  10. Knock, knock. Who's there? Gopher. Gopher who? Gopher me, not some other guy.
  11. Knock, knock. Who's there? Hershey's. Hershey's who? Hershey's *kiss*.
  12. Knock, knock. Who's there? Honeydew! Honeydew who? Honeydew you know how much I love you?
  13. Knock, knock. Who's there? Iguana. Iguana who? Iguana take you out this weekend.
  14. Knock, knock. Who's there? Juno. Juno who? Juno I love you, don't you?
  15. Knock, knock. Who's there? Kiss. Kiss who? Kiss me!
  16. Knock, knock. Who's there? Muffin. Muffin who? Muffin in this world can keep us apart.
  17. Knock, knock. Who's there? Needle. Needle who? I needle little love right now.
  18. Knock, knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you stunning.
  19. Knock, knock. Who's there? Owl. Owl who? Owl be seeing you real soon.
  20. Knock, knock. Who's there? Pauline. Pauline who? Pauline you think we can go on a date?
  21. Knock, knock. Who's there? Pear. Pear who? We'd make a great pear, don't you think?
  22. Knock, knock. Who's there? Snow. Snow who? Snow use, I still can't stop thinking about you!
  23. Knock, knock. Who's there? Spelling bee. Spelling bee who? Spelling be mine: B-E-M-I-N-E.
  24. Knock, knock. Who's there? Wendy. Wendy who? Wendy you think we can go on a date?
  25. Knock, knock. Who's there? Wire. Wire who? Wire you and me not out on a date?

Short Jokes

  1. Arguing with a woman is like getting arrested. Everything you say will be used against you!
  2. I just saw two zombies on a date. And they say romance is dead.
  3. I know it is going to sound cheesy, but I think you're the gratest.
  4. I must be a snowflake because I've fallen for you.
  5. I'm in a long distance relationship. My girlfriend is in the future.
  6. I'm no photographer, but I can picture us together.
  7. I'm so glad to have your beards right above my head whenever I'm wrapped in your arms, they give me an opportunity to tender a garden so close to me.
  8. If a woman is cold as a fish, a man has to be as patient as a fisherman.
  9. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and me together.
  10. If kisses were snowflakes, I'd send you a blizzard.
  11. If you were a potato, you'd be a sweet one.
  12. If your wife laughs at your funny jokes. It means you either have a good joke or a good wife!
  13. Is your name WI-FI because I'm sensing a strong connection?
  14. Just went on a date with a welder. Man, the sparks were flying!
  15. Love is in the air? What about the Oxygen!
  16. Make love, not war, and If you want both... Get married.!
  17. My girlfriend isn't talking to me. She said I ruined her birthday. I'm not sure how. I didn't even know it was her birthday.
  18. My girlfriend left a note on my PS4 today. My heart stopped beating because it said: This isn't working. Imagine my relief when I turned it on and it worked just fine.
  19. My wife is so sweet, every day she asks me what I want to have for dinner and then tells me to get it packed on the way back home!
  20. We're not socks. But I think we'd make a great pair.
  21. What happened when the two vampires went on a blind date? It was love at first bite.
  22. What is the true purpose of Valentine's Day? To remind single people they are single.

Best Jokes

  1. Why do men like to fall in love at first sight? Because doing so saves them a lot of money.
  2. A couple are on a date at a fancy restaurant. The woman tells the man to say something to her that will get her heart racing. He replies, I forgot my wallet.
  3. A couple is on a date at a fancy restaurant. The woman tells the man to say something to her that will get her heart racing. He says, I forgot my wallet.
  4. A girl asked her boyfriend if he would still love her after marriage. He replied, that depends on what your husband will think.
  5. A husband and wife are drinking wine at home. The wife says, I love you. The husband asks if that is her or the wine talking. She replies, It's me talking to the wine.
  6. A husband was looking at himself in the mirror and asked his wife, will you still love me when I am old, fat, and bald? She replied, I do.
  7. A husband was throwing knives at his wife's photo and missing the target. All of a sudden, she called to ask what he was doing. His reply was, I am missing you.
  8. A man and women were getting married in a courthouse. As they were leaving the courtroom, the bride said to the groom, Isn't it nice to be here when we're not being convicted of something?
  9. A successful marriage is based on give and take: It starts with money, gifts, dresses, and then goes with advices, lectures, and tensions!
  10. A T-Rex told his girlfriend, I love you this much, as he stretched out his arms. To which the girlfriend replied, that's not very much at all!
  11. A woman made the decision to break off her recent engagement and her friend said, what happened? I thought it was love at first sight! To which the woman replied, but the second and third ones changed my mind.
  12. An archaeologist is definitely the best husband a woman could ever have. The reason for this is because the older she gets, the more he will be interested in her.
  13. An older husband and wife were sitting together at home when a fairy appeared before them and offered to grant each of them a wish. The wife, who had always wanted to visit Paris, wished for tickets to Paris and the fairy granted the wish with a wave of her wand. A pair of plane ticket to Paris magically appeared in the wife's hand. Then it was the husband's turn to make a wish.
  14. Are you a banana? Because I find you a-peeling.
  15. Are you a camera? Because every time I look at you, I smile.
  16. Are you a cat? Because I'm feline a connection between us.
  17. Are you a cat? Because you are purrrfect.
  18. Are you a florist? Because ever since I met you, my life has been rosy.
  19. Are you familiar with that tingly feeling that you get in your body when you start to develop feelings for someone? That feeling is actually all of your common sense leaving your body.
  20. Are you French? Because Eiffel for you.
  21. Are you from Starbucks? Because I like you a latte.
  22. Before you decide to make the commitment to marry a person, you should have them use a computer with a very slow internet connection so they can show you who they truly are.
  23. Being in love is a lot like central heating in your home. You turn it on just before your guests come over and pretend that your house is always like this.
  24. Bigamy is having one wife too many, but monogamy is the same.
  25. Call me Shrek because I'm head ogre heels for you!
  26. Can I borrow a kiss from you? I promise you that I will give it back.
  27. Can I have your picture so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas? I love you so much.
  28. Charizards are red, Squirtles are blue, if you were a Pokemon, I would choose you!
  29. Confucius says,'Love one another.' If it doesn't work, just interchange the last two words.
  30. Definition of Honeymoon: a man's last holiday before he starts working for a new boss.
  31. Did I tell you that the girl I have been seeing works at the zoo? I think she's a keeper.
  32. Did it hurt? When you fell out of heaven?
  33. Did you hear about the porcupine who was near-sighted? He fell in love with a pincushion.
  34. Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk past again?
  35. Do you have a bandage? Because I just scraped my knee falling for you.
  36. Do you have a date for Valentine's Day? Yes, it is February 14th.
  37. Do you know about the concept of Newton's law? It states that for every idiot, there is an equal and opposite idiot. They are called husband and wife.
  38. Do you know what I did last night? I looked up at the stars and matched each one with a reason why I love you.
  39. Do you know what my shirt is made of? Boyfriend/girlfriend material.
  40. Do you know what the big difference is between love and marriage? Love is the sweet dream and marriage is the alarm clock.
  41. Do you like Mexican food? Because I want to wrap you in my arms and make you my BAE-RITTO.
  42. Do you like Star Wars? Because Yoda only one for me!
  43. Do you like vegetables? Because I love you from my head tomatoes.
  44. Do you love me? There are 101 reasons why I love you, shall I describe?
  45. Do you play soccer? Because you're a keeper!
  46. Do you want to know why I plan on no longer using Google anymore? Because after all this time that I have spent searching, I have found the love of my life and it is you.
  47. Do you want to know why my husband and I will never ever need a marriage counselor? He majored in communications in college and I majored in theater. So he communicates with me a lot and I always make the effort to pretend to listen.
  48. Even if there weren't gravity on earth, I'd still fall for you.
  49. Even though there aren't any stars out tonight, you're still shining like one.
  50. Falling in love is like going deep into a river. It is much easier to get in it than it is to get out of it.
  51. Forget about the butterflies. When I am with you, I feel the whole zoo.
  52. Four plus four equals eight, but you plus me equals fate.
  53. Funny equality law: The time taken by a wife when she says I will be ready in 5 minutes to go outside is exactly equal to the time taken by a husband when he says I will be home in 5 minutes.
  54. Funny quote written on a husband's t-shirt: If all are devils, my wife is the queen of them.
  55. Have you ever been fishing before? I only ask because I really think that we should hook up.
  56. Hey girl, your smile reminds me of McDonalds, because I'm loving it!
  57. How did the astronaut's girlfriend respond when he proposed to her in space? I'm so happy I can't breathe!
  58. How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend? He gave her a ring!
  59. How did the telephone propose to its girlfriend? He gave her a ring.
  60. How did the telephone propose to its girlfriend? It gave a ring.
  61. How do you get a banker to fall in love with you? Pique their interest.
  62. How the word Wife was invented? They took the first two and last two letters of Wildlife!
  63. How to get a farm girlfriend, like you? Ride a tractor.
  64. Husband and wife had a fight. Wife called mom: He fought with me again, I am coming to home. Mom: No dear, he must pay for his mistake, I am coming to stay with you at your home.
  65. I always like to let my wife know who the boss is in this house. And I do that by holding a mirror up to her face.
  66. I broke up with my girlfriend at a restaurant. She started crying. Everyone thought I proposed to her so they started clapping.
  67. I don't know your name yet, but it must be Wi-Fi because I am feeling such a strong connection here.
  68. I have been happily and blissfully married for 5 years...out of a total of 20.
  69. I have not spoken to my wife in quite a few years. I just did not want to interrupt her.
  70. I know this is going to sound cheesy, but I think you're the grate-est.
  71. I love everyone. Some people I love to be around, while some of them are people who I would rather avoid. And then there are some who I would love to punch in the face.
  72. I love you more today than I did yesterday. But that's because yesterday I was really mad at you.
  73. I love you today more than I did yesterday. And that is because you really ticked me off yesterday.
  74. I love you with all my butt. I would say my heart, but it is just not as big.
  75. I must be a snowflake, because I've fallen for you.
  76. I realized why they say love is blind, because you shine too bright.
  77. I said, I love you so much. I could never live without you. My girlfriend giggled and asked, Is that you talking or the beer? I said, It's me talking to the beer.
  78. I think you might be suffering from a lack of vitamin me.
  79. I used to date a girl that reported the weather. We'd have a stormy relationship.
  80. I want someone to look at me the way I look at chocolate cake.
  81. I want to spend the rest of my life trying to get out of debt with you.
  82. I was a dude before marrying. BantAnd what are you now? SantNow I'm subdued!
  83. I was in the shop looking for a jacket to buy a present for my girlfriend. I couldn't decide which one to get, so I asked the salesman, If you were buying a jacket for your girlfriend, which one would you get? He said, A bulletproof one. I'm married.
  84. I was married by a judge. Little did I know that I should have asked for a jury too.
  85. I'm no photographer, but I can picture us together.
  86. I'm still clueless in deciding who the real copycat is, between you and the rainbow; you're glowingly beautiful, dear.
  87. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put the letters U and I together.
  88. If I had a star for every time you brightened my day, I'd have a galaxy in my hand.
  89. If I have to choose between men and shoes, I will choose shoes. They tend to last longer.
  90. If I met you as a space traveler, the only gravitational force that would keep me on the surface of the moon would have been your smile radiating from the earth. Keep smiling, darling!
  91. If I were a cat, I'd spend all 9 lives with you.
  92. If I were a transplant surgeon, I'd give you my heart.
  93. If loving you is a crime, I'd be ready to serve a life sentence but the jail must be in your heart.
  94. If Shakespeare had made me Romeo, and you, my Juliet, I would have refused to die at the end of the script, I'd rather end it with you Happily Ever After.
  95. If stars would fall every time I would think of you, the sky would soon be empty.
  96. Is there an airport nearby, or is it my heart taking off?
  97. Is Your Love Life No Laughing Matter?
  98. Is your name Dunkin? Because I donut want to spend another day without you.
  99. Is your name WiFi? Because I'm really feeling a connection.
  100. Is your nickname Chapstick? Because you're da balm!
  101. It is said that in the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the wife listens. During the second year of the marriage, the wife speaks and the husband listens. And on the third year of marriage, both the husband and wife speak and the neighbors listen.
  102. It is very important to have a woman who can cook, clean, and take care of the kids. And it is just as important to have a woman who can keep you happy in bed. And most of all, it is important that these two women never meet.
  103. Knock, knock. Who's there? Amish. Amish who? Aw, Amish you too!
  104. Knock, knock. Who's there? Candice. Candice who? Candice be love that I am feeling right now?
  105. Knock, knock. Who's there? Eyesore. Eyesore who? Eyesore do love you a lot.
  106. Knock, knock. Who's there? Frank. Frank who? Frank you for loving me.
  107. Knock, knock. Who's there? Honeydew. Honeydew who? Honeydew you know how much I love you?
  108. Knock, knock. Who's there? Juno. Juno who? Juno that you're the love of my life?
  109. Knock, knock. Who's there? Olive. Olive who? Olive you, and I don't care who knows it.
  110. Knock, knock. Who's there? Owl. Owl who? Owl always love you!
  111. Knock, knock. Who's there? Pauline. Pauline who? I think I'm Pauline in love with you.
  112. Knock, knock. Who's there? Will. Will who? Will you marry me?
  113. Knock, knock. Who's there? Abby. Abby, who? Abby anniversary, my love!
  114. Knock, knock. Who's there? Amish. Amish, who? Aw, Amish you too!
  115. Knock, knock. Who's there? Anita. Anita, who? Anita kiss from you.
  116. Knock, knock. Who's there? Ben. Ben, who? Been thinking about you all day.
  117. Knock, knock. Who's there? Canoe. Canoe, who? Canoe give me a big kiss?
  118. Knock, knock. Who's there? Cereal. Cereal, who? Cereal blessing to be married to you.
  119. Knock, knock. Who's there? Churchill. Churchill, who? Churchill be the best place for a wedding.
  120. Knock, knock. Who's there? Eyesore. Eyesore, who? Eyesore do love you a lot.
  121. Knock, knock. Who's there? Frank. Frank, who? Frank you for loving me.
  122. Knock, knock. Who's there? Guinevere. Guinevere, who? Guinevere going to get married?
  123. Knock, knock. Who's there? Halibut. Halibut, who? Halibut a kiss for me?
  124. Knock, knock. Who's there? Harry. Harry, who? Harry up and kiss me!
  125. Knock, knock. Who's there? I love. I love, who? I love you too!
  126. Knock, knock. Who's there? Iguana. Iguana, who? Iguana love you forever and always.
  127. Knock, knock. Who's there? Ivana. Ivana, who? Ivana spend the rest of my life with you.
  128. Knock, knock. Who's there? Juno. Juno, who. Juno that you're the love of my life?
  129. Knock, knock. Who's there? Keith. Keith, who? Keith me, my love!
  130. Knock, knock. Who's there? Leena. Leena, who? Leena little closer so I can kiss you!
  131. Knock, knock. Who's there? Luke. Luke, who? Luke into my eyes and tell me that you love me.
  132. Knock, knock. Who's there? Mary. Mary, who? Mary me, and I will love you forever.
  133. Knock, knock. Who's there? Norma Lee. Norma Lee, who? Norma Lee I don't say this, but I think that I am falling for you.
  134. Knock, knock. Who's there? Olive. Olive, who? Olive you so, so much!
  135. Knock, knock. Who's there? Olive. Olive, who? Olive you, and I don't care who knows it.
  136. Knock, knock. Who's there? Pauline. Pauline, who? I'm Pauline in love with you more and more each day.
  137. Knock, knock. Who's there? Wanda. Wanda, who? Wanda marry me?
  138. Knock, knock. Who's there? Will. Will, who? Will you marry me?
  139. Let's commit the perfect crime together. I'll steal your heart and you can steal mine.
  140. Love is a condition of temporary insanity. And the only available cure for this sickness is marriage.
  141. Love is a form of amnesia where a girl forgets that there are about 1.2 billion other boys out there in the world.
  142. Love is a lot like peeing in your pants. Only you can feel the warm sensation from such an experience.
  143. Love is a very complex matter of chemistry. And that is why my wife treats me like toxic waste!
  144. Love is getting mad at someone, telling that person to go to hell, and hoping that they get there safely.
  145. Love is like having to pass gas. If you force, then you are going to make a mess.
  146. Love is not having to hold in your gas anymore.
  147. Love is when I walk to the other side of the classroom to sharpen my pencil just so I can see her. And then I realize that I am holding a pen.
  148. LOVE stands for Loss Of Valuable Energy.
  149. Love thy neighbor, but make sure that her husband is away first!
  150. Marriage comes with no guarantees, so if that is what you are looking for, then you are better off buying a car battery.
  151. Marriage is an incredible invention, but then again so is the toaster.
  152. More or less, every husband is like a movie; produced by mother and directed by wife!
  153. My boyfriend and I met on the internet. My mother asked him what line he used on me and my boyfriend replied, I just used a modem.
  154. My feet are getting cold... because you've knocked my socks off.
  155. My girlfriend is always stealing my t-shirts and sweaters... But if I take one of her dresses, she says, we need to talk.
  156. My girlfriend told me she was leaving me because I keep pretending to be a Transformer. I said, No, wait! I can change.
  157. My husband is of the opinion that I am absolutely crazy. But if he is the one who decided to get married to me, then that makes him even crazier than I am.
  158. My name is Microsoft. Can I crash at your place tonight?
  159. My prince is not coming on a white horse. He's riding a van, and definitely lost.
  160. My wife is definitely a sex object in that every time I ask her for sex, she objects.
  161. Never laugh at your significant other's choices because you happen to be one of them.
  162. On a scale of 1 to 10, you are the only 1 for me.
  163. One day, a husband told his wife that her rear end was getting so big that it was as big as their grill. Later that night, he tried to get intimate with her in bed only for the wife to reply, do you really think that I am going to fire up this grill for just one little weenie?
  164. Our love will never become cold and hollow unless one day you refuse to swallow.
  165. Real astronomers are in our family. First, mother who showed the moon in childhood. Second, father who used to show the whole universe in one scolding. Third, wife who shows stars during the day. This NASA is just confusion.
  166. Romantic love is a mental illness, but it is a pleasurable one.
  167. Roses are red. Violets are blue. If you were a Pokemon, I'd choose you.
  168. The brain is the most impressive organ in our whole body. From the day you are born, it works 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, right up until you fall in love.
  169. The funniest joke of all time is my love life.
  170. The husband said that he was always jealous of the older men with much younger and prettier wives and he wished for a wife who was 20 years younger than him. So the fairy waved her wand and granted his wish. But imagine the man's shock when he opened his eyes to find that he was 20 years older!
  171. The voice of love seemed to call me, and then I realized that it was a wrong number.
  172. The woman was hungry for love and had no idea where her next male was coming from.
  173. There are only two kinds of people I know; the lover and the loved, and you happen to have acted both persons to me.
  174. There is a special place where a man can touch a woman that will make her go crazy. Her heart.
  175. There were two antennas who met on a roof and they fell in love and decided to get married. The ceremony was nothing fancy, but you could tell that they had a very strong connection.
  176. There were two antennas who met on a roof, they fell in love and decided to get married. The ceremony was nothing fancy, but you could tell that they had a strong connection.
  177. They say Disneyland is the happiest place on earth. Well apparently, no one has ever been standing next to you.
  178. Two golden rules of a happy marriage: 1. The wife is always right. 2. When you feel she is wrong, read rule number 1 again.
  179. We must both be subatomic particles because I feel this strong force between the two of us.
  180. What are the three big rings of life? They are the engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering.
  181. What did Dolly Parton sing to the orca? I whale always love you.
  182. What did one boat say to the other? Are you up for a little row-mance?
  183. What did one grizzly say to the other? I've bear-ed my soul!
  184. What did one light bulb say to the switch? You turn me on.
  185. What did one lightbulb say to their sweetie? I love you a whole watt!
  186. What did one little flame say to the other? We're a perfect match.
  187. What did one raspberry say to the other? I love you berry much.
  188. What did one volcano say to the other volcano? I lava you.
  189. What did one watermelon say to the other? You're one in a melon!
  190. What did the astronaut's fiancé say when he proposed to her in open outer space? She said, I can't breathe!
  191. What did the astronaut's girlfriend say to him when he proposed in outer-space? I can't breathe!
  192. What did the Australian zoologist do with his sweetheart? Spend koala-ty time together.
  193. What did the barista say to his crush? I like you a latte.
  194. What did the calculator say to the pencil? You can always count on me!
  195. What did the cat say to her girlfriend? You're purrr-fect for me.
  196. What did the deer say to its baby? I'm fawning over you!
  197. What did the light bulb say to the switch? You turn me on.
  198. What did the lightbulb say to their sweetie? I love you a whole watt!
  199. What did the octopus say to its octopus crush? I wanna hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand.
  200. What did the paper clip say to the magnet? I find you very attractive.
  201. What did the patient with the broken leg say to their doctor? Hey doc, I have a crutch on you.
  202. What did the poodles say to each other after making up? Life is dog-gone ruff without you.
  203. What did the snake say to his girlfriend? Give me a little hiss.
  204. What did the stamp say to the envelope? I'm stuck on you.
  205. What did the volcano say to its true love? I lava you!
  206. What did the woman with a broken leg say to her crush? I've got a crutch on you!
  207. What do squirrels give each other? Forget-me-nuts.
  208. What do you call a colorful heart that loves books? Well read.
  209. What do you call a pair of fish? Sole-mates.
  210. What do you call two ants sharing a slice of pizza in Italy? Romance.
  211. What do you call two birds who are in love? Tweethearts!
  212. What do you call two cupids who fall in love? A match made in heaven.
  213. What do you call two rabbits in bed? Snuggle-bunnies.
  214. What do you get when you kiss a dragon? Burnt lips.
  215. What do you say about two fish getting married? They made it o-fish-al.
  216. What do you say to your single friends on Valentine's Day? Happy Independence Day!
  217. What does the ghost call his true love? His ghoul-friend.
  218. What happened to the two vampires who went on their first date? It was love at first bite!
  219. What happened when the candle went dating? It found the perfect match.
  220. What happens when you fall in love with a chef? You get buttered up.
  221. What is the difference between love and herpes? Love does not last forever.
  222. What is the ideal marriage? One that is between a spouse that is deaf and a spouse that is blind.
  223. What is the main difference between love and marriage? Love is blind. Marriage, on the other hand, is the eye opener.
  224. What kind of architecture makes people fall in love? Heart deco.
  225. What's the difference between love and marriage? Love is blind. Marriage is an eye-opener.
  226. When a man goes and steals your wife, the best revenge that you can have is to let him keep her.
  227. When a man marries a woman, it is the highest compliment that he can pay her, and it is usually the last.
  228. When one satellite dish falls in love with another, what's the best part of the wedding? The reception.
  229. When penguins find mates, they stay with them for the rest of their life. Will you be my penguin?
  230. When you are in love, it is the most glorious two and a half days of one's entire life.
  231. Where do hotdogs take their partners on Valentine's Day? To the meatball.
  232. Which song do sunflowers listen to when their girlfriend goes to work? Ain't no sunshine when she's gone.
  233. Who always has a date on Valentine's Day? The calendar!
  234. Why are dolphins so confident? They live life with porpoise.
  235. Why are men with pierced ears much better candidates for getting married? Because they have bought jewelry and have suffered greatly.
  236. Why did a food-holic woman married a chef? So he can cook all her favorite dishes at home.
  237. Why did the angel always wear a bow in her hair? Wearing an arrow would be dangerous.
  238. Why did the bee not trust her boyfriend? His stories were un-bee-lievable.
  239. Why did the bicycle fall in love with the lamppost? Because it was lights-on!
  240. Why did the lion break up with his girlfriend? Because she was a cheetah.
  241. Why did the man accuse his wife of robbery? She stole his heart.
  242. Why did the melons get married in a church? They cantaloupe.
  243. Why did the soccer player dislike Valentine's Day? He hated getting red cards.
  244. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
  245. Why didn't the skeleton send any cards? His heart wasn't in it.
  246. Why do painters always fall for their models? Because they love them with all of their art.
  247. Why is it wise to never break up with a goalie? Because he's a keeper.
  248. Why is Spider-Man the perfect boyfriend? Because he'll always stick beside you.
  249. Why should you never break up with a goalie? Because he is a keeper.
  250. Why shouldn't you fall in love with a pastry chef? He'll dessert you.
  251. Women can fake an orgasm, while men can fake a whole relationship.
  252. You are in my heart, my mind, and in my entire body. In fact, my doctor says that you must be a parasite!
  253. You are just like my car because you drive me crazy.
  254. You are like dandruff because I just cannot get you out of my head no matter how hard I try.
  255. You are like my asthma. You just take my breath away.
  256. You are like my dentures. I can't smile without you.
  257. You can fall from the sky, and you can fall from a tree, but the best way for you to fall is to fall in love with me.
  258. You cannot buy love, but you can still pay heavily for it.
  259. You look so familiar... didn't we take a class together? I could've sworn we had chemistry.
  260. You must be a broom, because you just swept me off my feet.
  261. You should never be in a big rush to end your marriage with your spouse. You never know if you might need them to finish a sentence.
  262. You're like a dictionary... you add meaning to my life.
  263. You're so sweet, you put Hershey's out of business.
  264. You're so sweet, you're giving me a toothache.
  265. You're like a dictionary; you add meaning to my life.

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