Parents Jokes

1. Behind every great parent is a great kid. Happy birthday
2. Being related to me is the best birthday gift you could receive.
3. Happy birthday to a [mom/dad] who’s smart, funny and good looking, from a [son/daughter] who inherited all your best qualities.
4. What did the Teddy Bear say after blowing out his birthday candles? No cake for me…I’m stuffed
5. You did a grape job raisin me. Happy birthday
6. You know you’re getting old when…there is nothing left to learn the hard way.
7. You’re not 50 years old, you are 20 years old with 30 years of experience

Old Dad Jokes

1. Another year older, but still not as old as your jokes.
2. Birthdays are also about presents and cake, and there’s plenty of room for jokes in these areas. Time these right and they will have the whole family laughing
3. Birthdays are like cheese. They stink more as they age, but some people just love the smell.
4. Congrats on another year of being able to embarrass me in front of my friends. It’s a true gift from God.
5. How does Dad count his birthday candles? He needs a calculator and a magnifying glass
6. I wanted to get you a really special gift for your birthday, but then I remembered that you still haven’t figured out how to use the last one I got you.
7. I’m not saying you’re old, but your birth certificate expired years ago.
8. They say age is just a number, but in your case, it’s a really high one
9. What did Dad say on his birthday? I used to be young and hip, but now I’m just hip-replacement
10. What did Dad say when he got a diet book for his birthday? Great, now I can eat my cake and read about how I shouldn’t be eating cake
11. What did Dad say when he got a toy train set for his birthday? Wow, it’s like you’re encouraging me to be immature
12. Why did Dad get a senior citizen discount on his birthday cake? Because the baker saw the amount of candles he needed
13. Why did Dad need glasses for his birthday? Because his eyesight was 20-20-50
14. Why did Dad’s birthday cake start to deflate? Because it realized it had more candles than frosting
15. Why did Dad’s birthday gift make him laugh so hard? Because it was a picture of himself from 20 years ago
16. Why does Dad’s birthday cake feel so lucky? Because it had lots of candles for wishes
17. You know you’re getting older when the candles cost more than the cake
18. You’re not getting older, you’re increasing in value like a fine wine.

Jokes for Friends

1. A guaranteed gift you get every birthday is another year older.
2. Be careful, too many birthdays can kill you
3. Don’t worry if no one comes to your birthday party because then you’ll have your cake and eat it too.
4. Forget about the past, you can’t change it. Forget about the future, you can’t predict it. Forget about the present, I didn’t get you one.
5. Growing old is inevitable, but growing up is optional.
6. Hey shawty, it’s sherbert day.
7. I will never dessert you.
8. Loving you is a piece of cake
9. Wine improves with age. You improve with wine.
10. You feta have a gouda birthday.

Food Puns

1. A lentil older, a lentil wiser.
2. Another birthday has creped up on you…
3. Don't worry. I would never baguette your birthday.
4. Hap-pea birthday
5. Happy birthday best tea
6. Happy Birthday Now, lettuce celebrate
7. Happy birthday, lettuce turnip the beet
8. Happy Birthday, stud muffin.
9. Have a fantas-taco birthday
10. Have a grate birthday in the cheesiest way possible
11. Have a rice birthday.
12. Here's to a soup-er birthday
13. Hope you have a tea-rrific birthday
14. How do pickles celebrate their birthday? They relish the moment.
15. It's sherbert-day
16. It's your birthday I hope you shellibrate
17. Oh ship, it's your birthday
18. Pieces of popcorn always have the best birthdays. Why? Because they're always popping
19. Sending you s'more birthday wishes
20. Why don't birthday candles ever exercise? They burn out too quickly
21. You might be a year older, but you donut look like it.

Age Jokes

1. Birthdays are good for you. The more you have, the longer you live
2. Birthdays are nature's way of telling us to eat more cake.
3. Don't be upset about your birthday. Just think, you're one year closer to getting the senior citizen discount
4. Don't stress about your eyesight failing as you get older. It's nature's way of protecting you from shock as you walk past the mirror.
5. Forget age. If you can still manage to blow out your birthday candles, everything is dandy.
6. Getting older has some benefits... Call it a senior moment and you can get away with pretty much anything
7. s the perfect age. You're old enough to recognize your mistakes but young enough to make some more.
8. The best part of being over fifty, is that you did all your stupid stuff before the internet.
9. The best part of being over forty, is that you did most your stupid stuff before the internet.
10. With age comes skills, it's called multi-tasking. Now you can laugh, cough, sneeze, fart, and pee all at the same time
11. Birthday candles don’t exercise because they burn out too quickly
12. Congrats on proving that getting older doesn’t mean getting wiser.
13. Does a green candle burn longer than a pink candle? No they both burn shorter.
14. For the record, you’re not old, you’re a classic.
15. Happy birthday to someone old enough to go vintage shopping in their own closet.
16. I hope the only things that blow are candles and balloons. Have a great birthday
17. I know birthdays get worse as you get older. But look at the bright side — not too many left now.
18. Looking 50 is great If you’re 60.
19. More candles means a bigger wish
20. They say everything gets better with age.
21. This whole birthday thing is getting old, don’t you think?
22. What goes up but never comes down? Your age
23. You are aged to perfection.
24. You are one candle closer to starting a house fire.
25. You know you are getting older when the candles don’t fit on the cake.

Menopause Jokes

1. I start out each day as Mary Poppins and end it as Cruella De Vil.
2. I'm still hot, but it comes in flashes.
3. Menopause gives me the freedom to say anything. The only filters in my house are for the coffee.
4. Night sweats and hot flashes are nature's way of lowering your heating bill so you can save more money for your retirement.
5. The 7 stages of menopause: Itchy, Bitchy, Sweaty, Sleepy, Bloated, Forgetful, Psycho.
6. When I asked for a smoking hot body, menopause was not quite what I had in mind.

Animal Puns

1. Happy bear-day
2. Happy birthday Age is Irrelpehant.
3. Happy birthday Have a crab-u-lous day
4. Happy birthday. Have a llama fun.
5. Happy birthday. You're one in a melon.
6. Here's to another koala-ty birthday
7. Hippo-birthday
8. Hope this birthday is toad-ally awesome.
9. How does the cat celebrate its birthday? By turning up the mewsic.
10. Lets' party owl night
11. Sending you lots of hedge-hugs this birthday.
12. Sound the a-llama It's your birthday
13. We hope you have an otter-ly amazing birthday
14. What does a cat like to eat on his birthday? Mice cream and cake.
15. What does a turtle do on his birthday? He shell-a-brates
16. What's a bee's favorite day? It's bee-day
17. Wishing you a whale of a good time on this birthday

Cake Puns

1. Have a flantastic birthday.
2. I like big bundts and I cannot lie.
3. Life is what you bake it.
4. My birthday cake brings all the boys to the yard.
5. Some only dream of cake. Others bake it happen.
6. What is a ghost’s favorite cake? I-scream cake
7. Why did the cupcake go to the doctor’s office? It was feeling crummy.
8. You batter believe it’s your birthday.
9. You make life so fun-fetti.

Car Dad Jokes

1. Another year of wisdom, another year of experience, and another year of… constantly tinkering with your car?
2. At what age do we take your license away from you?
3. Happy birthday to the dad who knows how to handle a stick shift, but still hasn’t quite mastered the art of backing up a trailer.
4. Happy birthday to the dad who knows how to rev up an engine and turn heads on the street.

Fishing Dad Jokes

1. Another year of wisdom, another year of experience, and another year of… constantly tinkering with your car?
2. At what age do we take your license away from you?
3. Happy birthday to the dad who knows how to handle a stick shift, but still hasn’t quite mastered the art of backing up a trailer.
4. Happy birthday to the dad who knows how to rev up an engine and turn heads on the street.

Jokes for Friends

1. A guaranteed gift you get every birthday is another year older.
2. Be careful, too many birthdays can kill you
3. Don’t worry if no one comes to your birthday party because then you’ll have your cake and eat it too.
4. Forget about the past, you can’t change it. Forget about the future, you can’t predict it. Forget about the present, I didn’t get you one.
5. Growing old is inevitable, but growing up is optional.
6. Hey shawty, it’s sherbert day.
7. I will never dessert you.
8. Loving you is a piece of cake
9. Wine improves with age. You improve with wine.
10. You feta have a gouda birthday.

Geek Dad Jokes

1. Another year older, but still exploring new worlds and galaxies with your trusty spaceship (or video game console).
2. On your birthday, may you receive all the latest tech gear and gadgets you’ve been dreaming of, and may your virtual reality headset never run out of battery.
3. Why did Darth Vader go to Dad’s birthday party? To wish him a force-ful birthday and remind him that he’s the father

Golf Dad Jokes

1. Another year of wisdom, another year of experience, and another year of… slicing the ball to the right?
2. Another year older, but still driving the ball farther than your age.
3. Happy birthday to the dad who knows how to handle a sand trap, but has trouble handling the laundry.
4. Happy birthday, Dad May your birthday be closer to par than your golf scores

Grey Hair

1. A little grey hair is a small price to pay for so much wisdom.
2. Don't worry, they are not grey hairs, they are wisdom highlights. You just happen to be extremely wise.
3. If grey hair is a sign of wisdom, then you're a genius
4. Those aren't grey hair you see. They're strands of birthday glitter growing out of your head.
5. You know you're getting old when the little old grey-haired lady you helped across the street is your wife.

Handy Dad Jokes

1. Another year older, but still convinced that you can fix anything with a little bit of elbow grease and some creative problem-solving.
2. Happy birthday to the dad who can fix anything around the house… except for the dishwasher, which has been broken for three months.
3. Happy birthday, Dad Here’s to another year of pretending like you know how to fix things around the house.
4. Here’s some duct tape so you can fix up that sore back and tape on a happy birthday smile
5. On your birthday, let’s put the hammer and nails aside and celebrate with some cake instead.
6. On your birthday, may your toolbox be overflowing with every tool you could ever need (even if you don’t know how to use all of them).

Memory Dad Jokes

1. Congratulations, you've finally reached the wonder years... wonder where your car is parked? Wonder where you left your phone? Wonder where your glasses are? Wonder what day it is?
2. I swear, if my memory was any worse, I could plan my own surprise party
3. I've reached an age where my train of thought often leaves the station without me.
4. The good thing about having a bad memory is that jokes can be funny more than once.
5. We'll be friends 'til we're old and senile... and then we'll be new friends